I am My Mother

I am My Mother’s Daughter.

I have to say, I used to be unapologetically against a lot of things I saw my mother do while I was growing up.  I always said “I will do things differently when I become a mother”, or say things like “how could a mother put that before her own children?”   Boy did I give my Mom a hard time growing up, thinking she was at times a selfish mother and didn’t always have our best interests at heart.  I felt I knew her reasons and in my eyes they were always bad ones.  I thought no reason was ever good enough to sacrifice the comfort of your own children.  

But it’s funny how as we mature and grow physically, mentally and psychologically, we realize we don’t know everyone’s reasons for doing what they do.  No one truly knows another’s plight until they are in their shoes.  I was judging the book that was my mother, by her cover.  “Cover” being the poignant word here because she tried to keep a cover on her real reasons for doing things the way she did.  In the end, she did the best a woman and mother couldvdo with the circumstances she was given.

As a single mother of four children she was trying to makes ends meet She’d work to feed, clothe and put a roof over our heads, put us in activities to keep us out of trouble, and allow us extra curricular so we didn’t feel left out. All this while still just trying to be a woman. A woman with needs, wants and desires like everyone else.  Should she be emotionally or physically neglected simply because she bore children? Should she not have simply because we need?

As a grown woman of three children of my own now, I know better now.  I understand her reasons now.  Child rearing is not a job for the faint of heart; one parent or two.  It can be rewarding yet at the same time thankless. It can be exciting yet challenging. And most importantly, we’re in it for the long haul… even when our children are grown, we are still never truly finished with our job.

So in the end, knowing what I know now, I want to say I understand Mom. I get it.   I realize now that I would have done things exactly the same way because….. I am my mother’s daughter.  

With love and deepest gratitude,

Your daughter

Sincerely,

Natalie Wilson, Owner
High Heal Diaries


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